Driving myself batty

So, i'm not sure what is wrong with me, but for a few weks now i've had this sad feeling, I can't get rid of, I don't know what it even is... but it wont go away, sometimes I just want to curl up and cry, but I don't allow myself to do so.

I wish I could figure it out, but there really is no apparent reason for the way I am feeling... and I know people pick up on it, because it changes me... maybe it's partly the wall I've put up.. maybe it's all the rain and miserable weather, or maybe I'm just crazy.

I know last night I couldn't sleep, I'm worrying about something silly... his best friend... female, who comes home this week... I know she is worried about me and thinks she wont get to see him, but to me that's strange as shes not been living here or in the picture...

I guess I worry that like in the movies he will realize she's the one he wants to be with, I went to HS with her and while I don't "know" her those who do just tell me how nice she is... he's excited for her to come home and to see her... I just don't know if I can hide being jealous and worried, but I don't think its wise to say anything.... not with everything else I am feeling for him...

Honestly I'm so happy I met him, and he makes me so happy... I think I'm so scared to loose that or eff it up I'm driving myself batty.